Summer Vacationing Do’s and Don’ts From The Movies
Summer vacations have been the subject of many, many movies. There’s something near mythical about the three warmest months of the year that make them an ideal setting for movies. Luckily for us, Hollywood has went to the summer vacation well so many times that there is now a wealth of information available to us before we embark on our own summer jaunts. Below I’ve listed eight of the most useful summer vacationing do’s and don’ts that the movies have to offer.
Vacations are stressful enough, so the last thing anyone needs is to arrive at their destination only to realize it isn’t open. That’s the sort of thing that could potentially drive a person to kidnap a well-meaning security guard and force him to open all the rides at Walley World. At least that’s what happened to poor Clark Griswald when he discovered that the theme park he had so wanted to share with his family was closed for repairs in National Lampoon’s Vacation. Granted, this final act of desperation came at the end of a road trip from hell, but even a peaceful trip can go pear-shaped when faced with a giant closed sign.
Calling ahead will save you time, heartache and a potential criminal record.
It’s safe to assume that most locals are going to be kind and welcoming, but on the off chance that they’re actually psychotic hillbillies ala Deliverance, or possibly in on a conspiracy to sacrifice you to some ancient, hungry gods, it’s best not to get too cozy. If you do decide to make nice with the locals, be polite and courteous, but always be prepared to run away the moment they mention anything about pigs.
While there is an entire movie subgenre devoted to road trips gone awry, not all journeys end in disaster.
For the teens in Y Tu Mama Tambien, a road trip through Mexico ended in self-discovery and for the family in Little Miss Sunshine it was a healing journey that brought them all closer together. So go ahead and embrace your wanderlust this summer, it might lead you to enlightenment…and if not, at the very least you’ll get some kitschy t-shirts out of the deal.
Vacation friends are great, right? At least they are until you find yourself alone on a hike with them and discover they’re secretly serial killers like the poor saps in A Perfect Getaway. Getting chummy with the strangers by the pool is fine, just don’t follow them to a second, isolated location where no one can hear you scream.
The Catskills aren’t the hopping vacation spot they once were, but if you want to have the time of your life and maybe come of age with the help of a handsome dance instructor named Johnny then they’re still the place to be. Don’t forget to carry a watermelon and learn how to nail a lift while you’re there, otherwise your summer vacation just won’t feel complete.
If money is tight this year, don’t feel bad about insisting that your kids make their own fun this summer. Kids that stay home for the summer can make all sorts of lifelong memories: they could make their own zombie movie (and see an alien), get caught up in an epic game of baseball like the youngsters in The Sandlot or maybe just have a bunch of random adventures like the preteens in Now and Then.
At the very least they can stay home and watch all of those awesome movies. Sure, it’s not quite as good as Disneyland, but if you throw in a viewing of Stand by Me it’s awfully close.
If the people in The Ruins had stuck to their itinerary instead of wandering off to a cursed hill with man-eating vines their vacation would have had a much happier ending. Don’t end up like the people in The Ruins. Go where you are supposed to go, and if you do feel the urge to go off the grid, tell someone first. Because if you don’t, it’s going to be no one’s fault but your own when you find yourself strangled by a sentient vine.
Duh. That’s where the giant man-eating sharks live.
Can you think of more summer vacationing do’s and don’ts from the movies?
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